Your destiny is all fucked up

Pretend meeting mocked for pretend calls to pretend entity by pretend journalists

Christiana Figueres, executive secretary of the U.N. Framework Convention on Climate Change, invoked the ancient jaguar goddessIxchel in her opening statement to delegates gathered in Cancun, Mexico, noting that Ixchel was not only goddess of the moon, but also “the goddess of reason, creativity and weaving. May she inspire you — because today, you are gathered in Cancun to weave together the elements of a solid response to climate change, using both reason and creativity as your tools.”

So of course, the wrong-wing media picked up on this.  They find it silly to call upon the help of a fictional deity whose existence cannot be demonstrated.  It is a bit silly, to be honest.

So whatcha doin’ Sunday morning?

The funniest science is bullshit science

New blasphemous art exhibition opens in Dublin

clingtomymouth:

(via antologia)

As if the original weren’t sickening enough…

The most horrible part is that, according to the bible, these people are dead on. That’s one of the ever-growing list of reasons why I don’t believe in the bible.

Kevin Smith protests Dogma

This just proves that these people didn’t even know what they were protesting.

Another one bites the dust…

Yesterday, we were treated to the sight of yet another Republican admitting his personal disgrace on national television.  The latest in a long string of Republicans to be shown for the hypocrites they are, Mark Sanford also embodies the sort of Family Values shitgobbler that has nearly wreaked our country.

I won’t bother anybody with the list.  And to be sure, there are a few Democrats in there, too.  Spitzer being one of the most notorious.  However, the Dems don’t build their entire rational for election upon the fact that they are “good”, “god-fearing”, “family” men.  If a Democrat gets elected, it’s because s/he has some kind of qualification that appealed to voters, or else their opponent was too much of a villain to allow his or her election.  Which is strong condemnation to be sure.  The kind of assholes that Americans regularly elect make it obvious that the villany bar is set far over most heads.

Getting back to my fucking point (I swear I have one), however…

I am mearly pointing out that these Family Values schmucks have repeatedly not only shown to be complete hypocrites (hookers, drugs, and other toe-tapping good times), they have also shown that they don’t know how to do anything.  Sanford himself made his name by being among the first in a string of Asshole Republican governors to reject Federal stimulus money for the unemployed in their state.  Debate the merits of the stimulus some other way, don’t sacrifice the well-being of your citizens to your partisan desire to say, “NO!” to the big bad Obama.  Go around to all the talk shows and argue it out all you want.  Make stumps speeches.  Whatever.  But at the end of the day, if money exists to help the people of your state, YOU FUCKING TAKE THE MONEY, ASSHOLE! And not for nothing, but if you’re leaving the state, or LEAVING THE FUCKING COUNTRY, you tell somebody where you can be reached.  I don’t care where you’re going to get your weenie moistened, you have fucking responsibilities as the chief executive of your state.

If people would stop electing these bozos purely on childish criteria like “Family Values” or religion or the fact that you’d like to have a beer with him, then maybe our country could make some progress.  But invariably, these types seem to end up in bed with somebody who isn’t their wife.  Whether that’s a man, woman, or corporation, is really the only thing left for us to speculate upon when the story starts to come out.

At least he wasn’t cornholing Chevrolet.

Holy brick!

Wow. This is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. This site is recreating the bible in Lego. As if the bible wasn’t silly enough. The worst part is that I don’t think it’s a joke. But how could anybody take this seriously?

But seriously, don’t fuck bears.  I’m with them on that one.

Yeah, that’s more like it.

Checkmate, Atheists!

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You have to admit, he makes some outstanding points! By the way, in case you don’t already know, bananas were bred by humans to be the shape (and size, and color, and flavor) that they currently are. Here is what a wild banana looks like: